Everywhere I go, something is there waiting for me. It's called the weather. On this August day, a heaviness hung in the air, brought on by heat and humidity. It was stifling. Archie Bunker's famous catchphrase "Stifle yourself" was directed at his sweet wife Edith in the classic TV show "All in the Family." This August day would have stifled Edith without need of … [Read more...]
There’s a Butterfly On My Foot and It’s Not a Tattoo
It's another day Goal achieved. I enjoy going places and seeing things. That was part of the reason I went out onto the deck of our home, but the primary reason was to fill the birdbath with water. I do that faithfully. Before I could pour any water, a northern house wren, a tiny bird whose name is bigger than it is, yelled at me. I don't believe he was shouting … [Read more...]
I Was Within Walking Distance of a Parade
I'm trying to train the fridge to hum a happy tune. It's not going well. Its morose humming was wearing on me, and I wish to make its droning a bit more upbeat. I hope it learns the song, "I Love a Parade." Find the nearest table or desk and start marching around it. Everybody sing along in the key of off. "I love a parade, the tramping of feet. I love every beat I hear … [Read more...]
Enter the Fairgrounds and Leave the Rest of the World Outside
Life was easier back when everything I ate went to my feet. Like a moth to a flame, I'm drawn to the fair – and not only as an innocent bystander. I've told stories on stage, answered questions about nature, helped presenters, served as a superintendent, pushed food, given away excellent yardsticks, acted as an emcee, represented organizations, been a vendor, shown animals, … [Read more...]
Not Every Hurricane Is Named After One of Your In-Laws
A hurricane is a tropical cyclone with winds of 74 mph or greater. The word hurricane is derived from the Mayan word Huracan, and the Taino and Carib word Hunraken, god of evil. Early tracking relied on geographic references and Catholic saint days before an Australian meteorologist pioneered personal names in the late 1800s, using the names of local politicians he … [Read more...]
I was a Rarity – One of Only 17,474 People
A friend told me she loved her Pontiac Vibe. I used to drive a Vibe. The first car I ever drove was a Pontiac. It was a Chieftain. They not only don't make them like they used to, they don't make Pontiacs at all. Her comment caused me to consider other brands I once patronized that are gone: Borders, Woolworth's and A&P. Life is a series of giving up things. … [Read more...]
Alpha, Lima, Lima, Echo, November. Bravo, Alpha, Tango, Tango.
The movie showed an Army radio telephone operator trying to communicate during a battle. The radioman used the NATO phonetic alphabet, which assigns 26 words, one each to a letter of the English alphabet. The purpose is to eliminate confusion or miscommunication when someone spells words aloud over a phone or radio. It adds clarity to the message by using A: Alpha, B: Bravo, C: … [Read more...]
You Cannot Put a Saddle on Slobber
We had attended a baptism. The baby was the best I'd ever seen at being baptized. My father wore a suit, tie and wingtips. He polished the shoes before taking a step and polished them again before putting them away. As an in-law, his job was chauffeuring, eating and then standing around at a relative's home, sighing deeply until it was time to leave. A fellow in-law told … [Read more...]
All That Glitters is Not Gold or Goulash
Little did I know I was on the brink of an adventure. It happened during a meal. No, it wasn't the one with the granola that had granite in it, and the rice cake with birthday candles on it. Goulash was one of my favorite dishes in our school lunch program, otherwise known as fine dining. We were blessed with talented and caring cooks who also lovingly prepared tater tot … [Read more...]
He Had Been Counting On Better Results But He Counted Wrong
July 4 had come and gone. There had been fireworks galore, and he still had most of his eyebrows. It had been a splendid summer. He'd never heard of L. P. Hartley, but Hartley had said, "The past is a foreign country; they do things differently there." But one thing remained constant. When summer ends, school begins. On a lifelong journey of self-discovery, he was in junior … [Read more...]