It would have been dark if not for the full moon. If that moon had been a musical instrument, it’d have been blaring. It caused me to think of the poet Tom Hennen’s book titled “Darkness Sticks to Everything.” It failed to stick on a bright night. I went for a walk in the moonlight. I needed to walk because I had stopped at a bakery and a meat market earlier in the day. I … [Read more...]

“You can keep the extra steering wheel.” I remember the car salesman saying that because it’s not something I hear every day. I was a whippersnapper buying a car that wasn’t secondhand. A few more hands than that were involved, but it hid its rust well, wasn’t haunted, and had an AM radio that could find WDGY and its pulsating rock and roll most days. The car didn’t run … [Read more...]

I had been outside attempting to fence in the mosquitoes. I made a noble effort, but it didn’t work. What it did do was work up a thirst for both me and the mosquitoes – the former for water and the latter for blood. I needed a cold drink of water. I strolled to the kitchen, where I opened the refrigerator door and grabbed a jug of water. It felt sun-warmed, as if it had just … [Read more...]

We weren’t circumnavigating the globe like Magellan. My wife and I were at a flea market in Mission, Tex. Flea markets are more common than fleas in the Lower Rio Grande Valley. Alex Tilley had searched high and low for a durable sailing hat that matched his passion for the outdoors. He couldn’t find one, so he created one. My wife bought me a Tilley Hat at that flea market … [Read more...]

I made the mistake of ordering two pancakes from a delightful cafe. I ordered nothing more than the two pancakes. The problem wasn’t that they weren’t good. The pancakes were spectacularly toothsome. The problem was that each one was the size of a manhole cover. They flopped all around the edge of a large plate. If I were the kind to take photos of my food, I’d have taken a … [Read more...]

It was a lovely day. The birds were singing. They were singing, “Ya got trouble, folks! Right here in River City. Trouble with a capital “T” and that rhymes with “P” and that stands for piano!” That’s right, there was a storm looming on the horizon. We’d bought a house that came equipped with a piano. The piano had been placed in the basement, and the rest of the house … [Read more...]

He was a cowboy. There was no doubt. He never missed an episode of “Gunsmoke.” He’d seen all 635 episodes at least twice. He thought Marshal Matt Dillon should have been president. He even listened to the singing cowboy, Gene Autry, when his ears had a vacancy. He tried watching a TV series called “Yellowstone,” but found it resembled “The Godfather” or “The Sopranos” more … [Read more...]

He’d been a spunky boy. Everyone said so – his parents, teachers and family elders. He had way too much energy for those who weren’t morning people. “You’ve got spunk,” Lou Grant said to Mary Richards on the first episode of “The Mary Tyler Moore Show.” And then Grant added, “I hate spunk.” Reuben loved spunk. He worried he was losing something that had defined his … [Read more...]

“Fasten your seatbelts; it’s going to be a bumpy night.” That famous line, often misquoted as “Fasten your seat belts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride,” was spoken by a past-her-prime actress with a flair for drama named Margo Channing, played by Bette Davis, in the movie “All About Eve,” released in 1950. The film was based on the 1946 short story “The Wisdom of Eve” by Mary … [Read more...]

You grew up in a weird family. Everyone did. The International Order of the Wacky and Quirky Rulemakers created most of the rules, but each family was given considerable latitude in making or changing rules for the weirder. Most people can remember bringing a significant other home to meet the family. That was stress-inducing. Much preparation was required to cover all … [Read more...]