I’m going to let you in on a little secret. It’s actually a fight that my Flying Farmer husband and I have been having. It happens every day and we have a really hard time NOT having this fight. It’s almost like it’s part of who we are. No – I’m not talking about a fight we have with each other… I’m talking about the fight we have with the voices in our heads. Know what I mean? We all have them. We all have those nagging voices that are dogging us for one thing or another.
In his book “Us in Mind: How your thoughts can change your marriage”, author Ted Lowe suggests that we name that pesky voice in our heads so that we can more easily identify it and speak truth to it. It may sound funny, but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.
I was reluctant to name my negative voice, but I just decided we’re going to call her Sherry. (No offense to the Sherrys out there) Sherry says things to me that I would never – we’re talking N-E-V-E-R say to another human being. Sherry is a jerk with a capital J. She is relentless. She tells me I’m not good enough multiple times every day. She whispers in my ears when the mirror catches sight of my postpartum body. She can simultaneously tell me I’m under performing but too ambitious all in the same moment. I’d give Sherry zero stars in the friend department… but somehow I’ve invited her to camp out closer than anyone I’ve ever known; In my brain.
How is this possible?! It feels like her sole job is to tear me down and ruin my life. Does it ever feel that way to you? Does it feel like you are at war with your thoughts? Spoiler alert: You ARE… and it’s happening even if you don’t acknowledge that it’s happening. Craig Groschel wrote an amazing book about this mental war called “Winning the War Your Mind: Change your thinking, Change your life.” I highly recommend the read.
I used to think I was a victim of my emotions. Sometimes it feels like they just come and go as they please. Does it feel that way to you? Nothing could be further from the truth. Science shows us that we actually choose our thoughts and then those thoughts trigger chemicals in our bodies that cause what we call emotions.
What if we actually had control over emotions? What if Sherry could be tamed and put in her place?! How would life look differently if we took ownership of our thinking?
The Bible says this, and modern science confirms it: We are not stuck. Thousands of years ago, Paul wrote that we are “Transformed by the renewing of our minds” — Science today is showing exactly that. If we want something different, we need to think something different. We can be transformed by the renewing of our MIND.
Will it be easy? Of course not. Thought habits seem hard to break sometimes because they ARE hard to break. Neuroscientist Caroline Leaf says that thoughts make physical structures in the brain that are like ruts in a road. If you’re driving on that road, falling into the rut is much easier than getting out of the rut. It will take effort to get your tire out of the rut and on to the level road.
Good news: we CAN change.
Hard news: it will take work.
How many olympic athletes woke up from a video game stupor on the couch, looked down and saw rippling abs and a physic ready for competition? Probably no one. The same is true with thought training. This won’t happen by accident. This happens with training.
So what’s your Sherry telling you? Where are you being lied to? My Sherry tells me I’m stuck and overwhelmed – regularly. But guess what? I’m not.
I’m not stuck and neither are you.
The catch?
I’ll BE stuck if I think I am. If I believe Sherry, that’s where we will stay.
So let’s shut down the Sherry and start rehearsing the TRUTH.
What is true, what is right, what is honorable – think about such things.
What does that look like in your life?
Meet your farmer – Liz Gerdes. She & her husband run a farm-to-table raw milk dairy and farm Airbnb in Caledonia. If you’re looking for raw milk fresh from the farm, visit gerdesfreshfarm.com or follow her on Facebook @gerdesfreshfarm or Instagram @gerdesliz for more info.
Leave a Reply