On July 14, Minnesota Senator Al Franken put out a press release saying he would introduce legislation to “Address Teacher Shortages in Communities Across Minnesota.” The senator went on to say “I’m going to be working to pass my bill into law so that we can get more teachers to enter and stay in the profession.” While this is a noble idea and I fully support help for new teachers, here’s the part where I get to wave my walking stick about and grouse from the porch of the Old Millennials for a little bit. The truth is, Senator Franken, is that we have a lot of teachers who want to stay in the profession. It’s the profession itself that is keeping them from doing so.
I’m a certified teacher in Wisconsin, and I have substitute certification in Minnesota. I’m one $150 test away from full Minnesota licensure, but I have, shall we say, reservations before I spend three months worth of groceries on a job that may or may not be there. I finished my student teaching in the winter of 2008, just as the entire teaching world was in absolute upheaval, especially thanks to oligarchy lapdog Scott Walker. Gone were the days of Time Magazine boasting, as it did when I was in high school, that teaching jobs, ALL teaching jobs from Kindergarten through twelfth grade, would be a hot commodity and a doorway into lasting and rewarding employment. Now, of course, the talking heads like to bang on about STEM like they are particularly picky cannabis consumers, but wouldn’t you know it, someone forgot to tell all those kids who went to school to be teachers that, oops, partway through your tremendously expensive quest to guide the next generation, it turns out that you bet on the wrong horse.
My certification says History, and that’s just fine with me… until I try to find an actual teaching job. Now, despite taking some of the other classes in college, subbing for seven years in all subjects and scoring in the 85th percentile on a teacher’s exam that covered History, Psychology, Sociology, Geography and Economics, my ever-so-valuable little piece of paper only says History. I have the content knowledge, I have the experience, but I don’t have the certification in this certification-crazy time where you need to go to college to mow lawns. I’m serious. Google it. Why, you might ask, in a world where certifications are often the only way to get that magical foot in that wondrous door, can I not get the extended certification?
Money.
Education has now become a massive money-making industry just like it’s a money making industry to give someone medicine to keep them alive, so if I want to get that little piece of paper that proves things I already know how to do, I’ve got to pay up and go back to class. For the record, I’ve still got over $1,000 left in student loans from my first time around this Ferris Wheel of Doom, and I’m not exactly keen on another go-round. Who knows, maybe I’ll get a broader Social Studies certification only to find out schools are getting rid of the program entirely, or maybe they’ll just have Math, Science, and English teachers share the teaching of Social Studies to save a few bucks… like they already did in a school I subbed at in 2009. Oops.
Why did I get this piece of paper, again?
So here I sit, newly 32 years old and working three jobs just to try to provide the basics for my family. Meanwhile, Senator Franken wants to let me know he’s going to do as much as he can to help new teachers stay in the job. Senator Franken, if you don’t mind me asking… do you have any plans for those of us who were never allowed into the job in the first place? You say you’ll support teacher training and preparation, but how much will that cost, because I’m already skipping meals to make ends meet. I did my time, I paid my way and I’ve spent years in classrooms being cussed out, challenged by gang members, and having things thrown at me. I think for me, and a lot of other struggling people who just wanted to help the next generation forward, have done enough already and it wouldn’t kill the for-profit education industry to shave off a fraction of a percent of their money pile so we can do what we always wanted to do.