Eating at the kids’ table during the holidays is one of my favorite memories. The food was great, but the company was superb. As the oldest cousin, I was put in charge by trusting adults. It worked to everyone’s advantage. The adults had some peace and quiet, and the kids had the kitchen with running water, a refrigerator full of bowls of whipped cream and the garbage can to make least favorite food disappear. No one in their right mind rummages through garbage unless a crime has been committed like on “Law and Order.”
Moats of mashed potatoes running with gravy and filled with tiny celery canoes can entertain children for 5-10 minutes. Mashed potato volcanoes spouting blood red cranberry sauce are also fun. Playing keep-away with snowflake dinner rolls keeps the diners’ attention. When one was inevitably dropped on the floor, I yelled into the adults in the dining room about what to do if someone accidentally dropped their dinner roll on the floor. The right answer of course was to put it in the garbage can. We children followed this rule religiously. Cousin Ervie manned the garbage can to give the impression that we had cleaned our plates.
The boy cousins chewed with their mouths wide open on purpose. I hope it was on purpose or else they were simply disgusting. My sister, Julie, decided to make this into a contest, so then we were all disgustingly spitting out food while laughing silently. Then the adults would question loudly, “Why is it so quiet out there?” There was no pleasing adults. Either we were too loud or too quiet!
Grandma stored her homemade donuts in a cream and green enamel roaster. Once we tried dipping some donuts in turkey gravy. They weren’t as good as donuts dipped in a bowl of whipped cream, so Ervie hid them in the garbage can under some newspapers. Like I said, having running water and the garbage can in the kitchen saved us kids a lot of trouble. We also experimented with other food mixtures like cranberries and creamed corn and green bean casserole and dressing. Some went into our stomach while others ended up in the garbage can. You can have soooo much fun with food.
One year my mother announced that I was old enough to sit at the adult table in the dining room. I felt proud. Ervie and Julie were happy because then they would be in control of the kitchen. Sitting at the adult table was peaceful and boring. Adults talked about politics, hunting, taxes and the weather. They chewed with their mouths closed and passed food politely. They said “please” and “thank you” and used their napkins a lot. They had forgotten how to have fun with food. I couldn’t stand it knowing all the fun that was going on in the kitchen. Fortunately, Ervie and Julie lacked practice in crowd control and one of the mothers went out to check on them. She screamed at all of them for having a food fight in the kitchen. She then announced that “Kathy would be sitting in the kitchen to keep control next year.” I was saved.
CHOCOLATE CARAMEL TURKEY LEGS
• 20 honey wheat braided pretzel twists
• 40 caramels
• 3 0z. melted chocolate
Microwave the caramels on high until softened, about 10-15 seconds.
Mold two softened caramels around the lower half of each braided pretzel to resemble a turkey leg.
Dip in melted chocolate, allow excess to drip off.
Place on waxed paper; let stand until set.
Store in an airtight container for up to 2 weeks.
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