By Pailey Gordon
Hegemonic masculinity has become a pressing problem that I have seen since I have entered high school. Every day it seems to be pushed upon the male population that certain things mean you are weak and certain things make you strong; even though some things do not necessarily mean you are weak, it means you are compassionate and caring.
So, what even is hegemonic masculinity? In early American and European culture, hegemonic masculinity is a standard on how a “real man” is illustrated by placing “rules” that are quite honestly impossible to achieve. Hegemonic masculinity is also known as toxic masculinity, and the terms can be used interchangeably.
As a society, we have placed showing emotion as a weakness, when it truly is not. We have defined a “real man” by violence, status, and aggression.
In order to bring awareness to hegemonic masculinity, I have personally interviewed a local male. He is a high school student in 11th grade at Fillmore Central. He spoke to me about how toxic masculinity has affected him and his peers.
Q: “What are some characteristics that society thinks is a ‘real man’?”
A: “Mainly people think of strength, power, and aggression. Those are the main three.”
Q: “Why is emotion portrayed as a weakness and aggression or violence as a strength?”
A: “When you see a guy, you think of someone who is strong and someone who isn’t going to break. When you see someone who is very emotional and really easy to break, it’s just not relatable to most guys.”
Q: “What are some examples of hegemonic masculinity that you see on a daily basis?”
A: “When you see guys even play fighting in the halls, they are still showing off strength, you don’t see guys sitting at a table talking about if they cried last night or how they feel. It’s usually about how much they lifted or if they won their wrestling match last night.”
Q: “Does toxic masculinity affect all males?”
A: “Yes, because guys have their emotions and how they feel and they know what their strengths are. Some of their strengths are lifting weights, being physically strong, and some have those social skills and know how to talk to people.”
Q: “Did hegemonic masculinity affect you at a young age?”
A: “Yes, I would say so. I wasn’t the strongest kid growing up, but I guess I had [name withheld] and people like him, so I didn’t really have to worry about it within my group too much.”
Q: “How has toxic masculinity affected you in high school/college?”
A: “Well, I guess it really hasn’t. No one has ever really made fun of me for being emotional or not being the strongest, but that’s because I hang out with the right people. I have seen it in some of my classes with my other classmates who are more emotional that are like, the laughing stock of the grade.”
Q: “Does age affect the intensity of hegemonic masculinity?”
A: “Yes. The older you are, the stronger you are expected to be rather than when you are younger, you aren’t expected to be as strong and aggressive.”
Q: “Why do you think society makes toxic masculinity relevant to this day?
A: “People are afraid to show their emotions, so they block it with the less important stuff and things that really don’t matter.”
Q: “Has hegemonic masculinity gotten worse for you or your peers within the past years?”
A: “No, I would almost say it has improved. Kids have really matured more now than when we were their age. There is less of a stigma for them.”
Q: “If we can, how do you think we can end toxic masculinity?”
A: “By involving those who are ‘weaker’ or kids who don’t fit in with you. Talk to them more and stop being aggressive to them.”
Toxic masculinity has affected so many men across the globe. After hearing his story, I hope this opens many people’s eyes to be more understanding and caring to one another and also help fix this broken way of standards that we place on a daily basis; with a little love and compassion for each other, maybe we can change the way society thinks.
Pailey Gordon is a student at Fillmore Central High School. She is one of eight area students participating in the Journal Writing Project, now in its 20th year.
Kim Wentworth says
WOW. B.S. so pure