Eat Well, Be Well, Have Fun “The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove then the hunger for bread” – Mother Teresa

Until a couple of weeks ago I was a virgin.

Bread baker that is. My need to be creative and open minded about recipe following always seemed to be a non-starter when it comes to baking.  I was always told that you can’t mess with baking recipes. You need to follow directions precisely. You can’t just change things willy nilly. “It’s the truth, trust me!”  Well, that is just not in my nature, so I never tried baking.

Then a couple weeks ago, I came across a “Simple Crusty Bread” recipe by a Minnesota Physician in the NY Times cooking section.  Four ingredients! Water, flour, yeast and salt!  Say it isn’t so, Joe!  I simply adore a good crusty loaf of hearty bread with a stew or savory soup.  The thought of a warm fresh baked loaf of crusty bread on a cold February day was too intoxicating. I figured four ingredients how can this go wrong, right? And besides, there was no kneading, and a scant two hours rising and bake!  My ADHD was screaming, “Bake this bread.”

So, the next day, there I was.  Recipe on my laptop, kitchen apron on and flour, salt, yeast and luke warm water set to rock and roll.  It took every amount of my creative energy NOT to modify the recipe, not to add anything, not to deviate from the straight and narrow. Don’t be creative, follow the rules, do just as they say.  My mom, my wife and all my grade school teachers would all be laughing right now, saying this is an impossible task for Timmy Blanski.

The recipe, by the way, made four loaves, and easily stores in the refrigerator as dough if you choose to just bake one or two. It got better by the minute. After making my dough, letting it rise 2.5 hours, I divided out a quarter and decided to just bake one loaf as my ‘test.’  It was amazing! Simple, yummy, crusty, golden brown, with a soft dense and yet airy center.  I immediately heralded my success to all my foodie fans.

I proceeded two days later to press my luck. I did not want to mess with the baking gods, but I thought I would fold in a handful of dried minced garlic, and dried herbs saved from the summer garden. Fingers crossed, loaf number two was a smashing success; garlicky and herbal, amazing with warm butter. I was on a roll. Next up was chopped smoked jalapeños I froze last fall and a handful of white cheddar cheese. Bam, another amazing crusty loaf of {now more creative} Simply Crusty Bread.  I pushed my luck on number four, but baked a stellar caramelized onion and grated parmesan loaf.

The world was a brighter place! I have now even MORE Instagram worthy photos to bore friends and family with!  I’ve sent the recipe on to friends and have their rave reviews as well.  My cooking pal Mike was even here last weekend, and mostly to impress him, I did a new batch while he watched. I added the onions and cheese again to go with an amazing venison birria stroganoff that I need to tell you about some time too.

Mike was duly impressed, and said he was going to try it when he gets home. I said I have a jar of fresh dry yeast, “let me send some home with you.”  I grabbed a baggy and my measuring spoons, and the jar of yeast.  To be sure I did it right, I pulled up the recipe online with Mike watching. It read 1.5 tablespoons of yeast and 1.5 tablespoons of kosher salt. I took my little silver ring of measuring spoons and leveled 1 tablespoon  off and dumped it in the baggy. Looking for the 1/2 tablespoon, I stopped short and froze. I looked at all the spoons. There is no ½ tablespoon. I have made this twice before, what the…?! 

I looked at Mike quizzically, and asked, “How much is a ½ tablespoon?” 

He said “1.5 teaspoons.” 

“How do you know that?!”

Mike said, “Because I read and follow recipes!”

I looked at him dumfounded. I am now positive both times I made this bread I mistakenly used the 1 teaspoon and ½ teaspoon little silver tools on my ring! I completely screwed up, and on my first bread baking adventure I managed to only use 1/3 the yeast and 1/3 the salt the recipe called for!  I am still trying to digest what this means.

Mike just smiled and said, “I am beginning to better understand your aversion to recipes; perhaps it’s because you can’t follow them.”