Letterwerks Sign City
 
"Where Fillmore County News Comes First"
Online Edition
Wednesday, February 10th, 2016
Volume ∞ Issue ∞
 
<< | < | 155 | 156 | 157 | 158 | 159 | > | >>

Another One From Flaherty.... A second opinion


Fri, Jul 25th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

At one time I thought that I might amount to something. I soon realized that I would never make it as a doctor because I didn’t wish to expose myself to the various ills and complaints that any of my patients might have and if I didn’t have any patients how was I going to pay my office rent? I thought about becoming a veterinarian, but since I don’t like cats and I always become nervous around cows and horses for fear that I might step in something unpleasant, I didn’t think that I could make much of a living at it.

I liked the idea of becoming a lawyer, and I did have some qualifications. I looked good in pinstripe suits, white shirts with French cuffs, silk ties, and black wingtips. I always liked fine leather goods and I would have the finest black leather brief case that money could buy. I enjoyed watching movies starring Spencer Tracy, Frederic March, Fred MacMurray, and James Stewart as lawyers.

I found a couple of law books in a second hand book store and began to read law, just like Abe Lincoln did. I had always been led to believe that Torts were a kind of cake and that Bonds were a type of investment. I never did discover the meaning of Bailments because every time that I tried to read one of the books, I nodded off to sleep. I began to realize that while I might look good in a pinstripe suit, I was not cut out to be another Clarence Darrow or William Jennings Bryan.

I gave some thought to becoming an airline pilot and went so far as to actually learn how to fly an airplane. Now flying can be fun if you don’t take it too seriously and aren’t afraid of heights. One of the first lessons to be learned is the theory of flight. Which in a nutshell, means that what ever goes up must sooner or later come down and how it comes down is up to the pilot.

I was spending a lot of time in the air and was having a pretty good time of it until one day the airport manager took me aside and recommended that I try another mode of transportation. He reminded me of the time that I had run out of gas over the state of Iowa, the time when I caused all of the horses to stampede when I flew over a Fourth of July Parade, and of the time when I managed to knock off part of the prop when I was landing the plane. He told me that his insurance company was going to double his premium if I continued to fly, and since the airport was owned by the city, the mayor and council informed him that .....
[Read the Rest]

Of People, Place, and Things:“Operation My Bad”

Fri, Jul 18th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

We used to say, “My fault,” when we made an error. Now the term is, “My bad.”  Well, CIA Director George Tenet has been saying “My bad” in public lately. Apparently Tenet cleared President Bush’s State of the Union Address wh ..... 
[Read the Rest]

At Home in the Woods: I found a fossil!

Fri, Jul 18th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

I worried about entertaining my 11 year-old great nephew for the weekend. I expected he would no longer be interested, as he once was, in making up adventures and running through the woods with a stick for a sword.

My plan for ..... 
[Read the Rest]

Little Wedding on the Prairie

Fri, Jul 18th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

Editor’s note: On July 12, my neice Megan and her husband-to-be Chris were married on our farm. I presided at the ceremony with Doris Grindland, a Special Appointed Court Commissioner to perform civil wedding ceremonies, officiating.  &nb ..... 
[Read the Rest]

Township Roads: Going Home

Fri, Jul 11th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

My family and I have moved from one quiet spot in the country to what we hope is another quiet spot in the country. We have left our acreage in LeRoy and moved just over fifty miles north and east. Our "new" place is six miles southwest of Elgin.[Read the Rest]

The Commute: The Pastor finds relief

Fri, Jul 11th, 2003
Posted in Columnists

I’ve just returned from another week at the original "Chautauqua" in New York, with a familiar dilemma: I have a real urge to talk about it, but find the whole place oddly indescribable.

Once again I spent the week with my dear ..... 
[Read the Rest]
<< | < | 155 | 156 | 157 | 158 | 159 | > | >>